Friday, September 17, 2004


im really going to have to go to the dentist. months ago my wisdom tooth decided to come through. except in true me fashion it decided only to break the skin of my gum and leave some "gross openness" there. despite having brushed and brushed i think theres something stuck in this "gross openness" and its caused a "big hurty thing" between my top and bottom rows of teeth. this, im guessing is the reason why my jaw line hurts and the right side of my face is a little swollen.

have i mentioned my intense fear of dentists? no? im sure i would have... i have an intense fear of dentists. when i was in year 4, aged 8, i had to see an orthodontist because i had an irregular bite. my top teeth sat almost directly on top of my bottom teeth instead of in front of them. so this orthodontist says i need something called a bridge set between my top teeth at the back.
to fit said bridge, orthodontist man needed a cast of my mouth so he could determine the size.
'what is your favourite flavour?' he asks, mixing up 'something' over on his desk
'strawberry?' i shrugged. never really had a favourite flavour. dont even think i ate strawberries at that stage, but hey, it was better than getting something gross like banana. i was thinking he might give me a lolly pop or something, so strawberry was the way to go.
'luck you, thats exactly what flavour this is' this happened to be a handful of plaster which he slapped into my mouth as i lay on the chair sputtering and choking.

yeah, good memories

i had to be careful eating things like toast because pieces could get stuck on top of the bridge, between it and the roof of my mouth.
the bridge had a key that needed to be inserted and pushed backwards towards my throat. the key had a length of dental floss attached to it incase it was accidentally dropped, for easy retrieval.
my year 4 teacher was mr aitchison who was an epileptic. we went on camp in year 4, i think it was to narnu, not sure. wherever it was, that doesnt really matter. what did matter was that my mum would not be coming on this camp. therefore she could not insert the key and push it towards the back of my throat. therefore someone else would have to do it. therefore it fell to an epileptic male teacher to insert a key into a small 8 year old girls mouth and push it backwards towards her throat, all the while holding tight to the dental floss, just incase.
i clearly remember sitting on a chair, my mum and my aitchison on either side of me, my entire class surrounding us as she instructed him on the way to insert the key and push it back.

did i mention how much i hate dentists? i really dont like going to the dentist

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