unrelated things

e found an earwig in his bed. 'oh my god! grandma was right! there are bugs in here!'. children are currently cleaning their room

today i found out tom nook is buying turnips for 318 bells. i sold mine yesterday for 116 bells. and i had a darryl braithwaite song stuck in my head. fml.

trying

so, we're trying. apparently. i dont know. sometimes it seems its not any different than before. and i see other people trying and i wonder if its all for show. its such public trying that it seems its all done to prove that everything is gonna be alright

im doing my trying quietly, at home, with no spectators. i dont know if its working. maybe. i kept checking my phone. but then the question came, 'do you want me to?' and i didnt know how to answer it. to be honest i cant remember how i answered it. i guess i'll find out in a week or so. 'otherwise it will be ages' is the reason. and yes, otherwise, it will be ages, but maybe thats what we need? or maybe what we need is more time closer together to work things out? but what if that closer together time makes us angry and quiet? i guess i'll have the answer then, wont i.

i keep getting asked how i am. and i dont know how to answer that. im fine. at least, i feel fine, but i know im not. i dont know if that makes any sense at all. im barely speaking, but i think thats a good thing, since no one is home. but thats a problem too, as i should probably be going out. but its so hot... just going to work is enough, really.

but my initial reason for writing, trying. im just not sure i know how to

oops

broke my blog

dear fast food chain

i fail to see how this qualifies to be a whole crispy strip

usually if they are small, you add another one. this time you didnt. thankfully i wasnt hugely hungry. you really should put the sauce in there though, its mean to ask me what sauce i want and then not give it to me

on the up side, the sunkist can is pretty



dear another fast food chain

do you think its possible for you to put a sign out the front of your stores to say when you are cleaning the ice cream machines, so i dont have to go through the drive through to find out i can have any cold milky beverages? its rather annoying, and i always think of how much further down the road i could be if i didnt stop. if i had a thickshake or an icecream, i wouldnt mind so much. or perhaps, you could have two machines that work on a roster system so that there is always icecream available? thats an idea. i doubt you're lacking in cash.

lastly, not related to fast food, but stuck on my fridge so still in some way related to food, this is what greets me every time i go into the kitchen

the internet is mocking me

facebook suggests i 'reconnect with adam'
email i just received tells me to visit britain again
a time capsule photo gets sent to me every now and then. todays is from 2006

in a style that is very strange for me, i was awake last night at 3am. ho ho ho, carly, you are a funny one. actually though, instead of being awake and angry at being awake and trying to sleep, i was writing.
ive been trying to write this song for a bit over a week now. its been in bits and pieces on paper and phones all around my bed. last night it all came together

every trick in the book

Hold on tight, you're needed now.
Dont let go of me.
The cold hard light of day didnt chase those thoughts away.
In fact it set them free.
Now im trying hard to feel how im expected to feel.
Waking up to the disappointment of what is real.

I kept the message that you sent me.
Remembering, imagining, hoping yes and no.
Remember how i said that i dared you?
Tell me, i'll stop if you say so.

I dont know what it was that i was looking for, but it was comfort that i
found.
And now those constant thoughts have hit my head with such a
force, they're spinning me around.

And though i couldnt have you, i wanted you to want me.
Watch me from your side of the room.
And thats the way we played our little parts in this game,
as responsible adults its what we do.

Is it the start of a pattern, or just a strange coincidence
when our fingers reach out at the same time?

im going to attempt a little more tidying today. see how it goes

apparently i'm missed

yeah. i havent been blogging, i know. sorry. to be honest, i didnt think anyone read this anyway, and it was just a page i used to keep all the sites i like to look at on one place. but thank you, if you do check back some times, for thinking of me

melbourne was great.
























the end

no, not really, but the pictures pretty much cover it

as you can see, there was driving, sleeping, bike riding, hat wearing, grammar/spelling correction, dolls, more driving, and more sleeping, but in a little more detail -

it was a very long drive. 7 people in an 8 seater tarago. 7 peoples bags, instruments and sexual innuendo.... so it was fun :) plus we made mixed cds which were super great.

after driving all day, we went straight to the venue which was awesome. gertrudes brown couch. you should go there. and we played with some amazing bands

owls of the swamp, and the tequila mockingbirds

listen to them, see them if they play, become their friends, they're lovely. hopefully they'll be coming to adelaide for next years format festival, so you should definitely listen out for that. hopefully humble bee and cheer advisory council will play too, and it;ll be a like a big reunion, aaaw.

so, friday night involved playing, pizza and panadol, then sleep. and saturday was all about awesome breakfast and garage sales. places like northcote make me wish i lived in melbourne sometimes. but i'd always miss adelaide.

saturday afternoon, humble bee played at idgaff with charles baby. he's a very sweet person, pays wonderfully, and sings beautifully. you should check him out too. possibly at format.

so, we played to a handful of people, the majority of whom were my band, and then we went out for ethiopian food. hell yeah. tasty as. after that we ended up at the old bar, i think? to see more bands. i was told by two male members of my band that the beer garden was full of hot young things. i didnt look out there, so i cannot comment. i can say that the 'things' i saw, were all aged around 13 and must have had fake IDs. before we even walked in, i heard on of the funniest things from the trip

bouncer: this you?
girl: yeah, i cut my hair
bouncer: lost a bit of weight too!

i know! who knew dogs could talk?!?!

saturday night was also where the grammar/spelling correction occurred.

sunday was driving. driving driving driving. very slow driving at first, since the marathon made it so that it took an hour to cross the city, but we eventually made it

we stopped in a town, somewhere, for lunch, and discovered that everyone in our band has a secret idea to open a cafe/gig venue/ art gallery/ thing. cheer advisory cafe, here we come! we also stoppped for free tea and coffee where ben proclaimed 'fuck it! im buying the lesbian book'. another highlight, especially for the grandmas running the shop

sunday night, we were still driving, i picked up adam, came home, kissed my kids and fell asleep. mmmmmm, my own bed

the following weekend, the council played the adelaide cd launch. you can listen to the songs at teh myspace, and buy a cd from us for$5. $5! you'd be crazy not to. we played with the british robots and the honey pies who are spectacularly awesome and amazing and it was a really fun, wonderful night, for many reasons.i had good talks with lots of people i dont really talk to, other than 'hey, how're you doing', and the entire band received a marriage proposal. cant ask for more than that

we played at the exeter friday night. i drank two shandys. it was a good night

please listen to noah and the whale

what you have to remember, and i need to constantly remind myself of this, is that people are idiots.

im generally grumpy today, so i feel quite at home in this thread. my head hurts. apparently i have sinusitis and my face hurts. my neck/shoulders/back/arms/even my hands hurt. my computer wont burn any cds and i need them by friday, especially be next friday for the lucksmiths show which i am so nervous about because i cant sing and have clearly gotten myself into something that i cant do. i can feel a pimple coming where my nose joins on to my face, you know that part? and its hurts and it feels like its going to be huge which is just what i need when im gonna be standing in front of 400 people singing badly and looking fat. i want to sew, but i dont know how. i want to clean my house but i cbf. i want to be a good mum and spend time with my kids but all i want to do is lay down and read. im reading the bell jar. again. not the best book to be reading when feeling like this, i realise that, but that brings me back to my first point which is - people are idiots, myself included

my band is playing with the lucksmiths next week. this is both exciting and terrifying.

mount gambier