growing up?

i first had sex when i was 15. i had been going out with phillip for quite a while. he used to meet me at the bus stop and walk me home. we'd kiss for hours and then he'd have to go home so i could have my tea. after tea we'd talk on the phone till bed time. at this stage i was still "in love" with a boy at my school. actually, he was a fuckhead, but he was good looking and that constituted loving him for me at that time. phillip and i would walk down the street and i'd be all giggly about how 'chris looked at me today' or something equally as lame and he'd just listen and go along with it. when he left at night, we'd tell each other how much we loved each other. i dont know if this was just being young, or a sign of things to come...anyway. we got a little older and things progressed. i used to have this 'nothing below my jeans' rule. it was an imaginary line that boys werent to pass. phillip understood that for a while, but after a while longer, the line disappeared and there'd be hands down there whenever the opportunity took us.
i remember when he was trying to convince me to have sex with him. we were standing on my driveway, kissing goodbye, and he says 'its not like i havent put things in there before, i dont see how this is anything different'. at least he was honest about it. he could have been all after school special and said that it would be a sign of how much we were in love blah blah blah.
we eventually did it. actually, thats wrong. i eventually gave in and laid there while i let him have sex with me. after a few times of refusing to enjoy it, i actually did and it was nice.
but my point is, we were together for about a year, i think, before sex came into it. compared to people i meet now, the waiting time is so different.
is it because i dont have to be in love to have sex? is it because i just want it? is it because i think if i dont do it i wont get the opportunity again?
i would watch shows like the secret life of us, and i would see the characters meeting someone in a bar, taking them home, sleeping with them and then saying goodbye. i have never done that. never. never had the thought or the opportunity. i wondered if these were a different class of people. people who could live their lives without having to think about every little thing.
im not totally into thinking. i will do it, given enough time. i will go over things, what has happened, what could happen, all the different outcomes.other times i dont want to think. i just want to do and a lot of the time these are the things that cause the problems in the long run.
so are these people happy? are they content with their thoughtless, free fucking lives?
maybe im somewhere inbetween now. i dont need to be in a relationship for 6 weeks before i let the sex happen. there is no set date that i will let the hands stray below the belt. im going to let things happen, not think too much, but keep to some level of decency by not fucking everything that crosses my path

maybe that will work

looking for cock

as bt3 suggested i'm on the hunt for cock. typing it into google, i had to wade through a whole array of gay sex. damn, hot boys getting it on, i dont know how i got through it. oh! speaking of hot boys getting it on, how much does this pic make you want to get your pants off and rub against their hotness???
that about makes me cum right now. or at least it would had my tummy muscles not been all worn out already. oh yeah, thats right. first orgasms in the new house and i dont think i need to emphasise the 's' on the end of orgasms. if i keep this up i'll have a nice flat tummy in no time.

ANYWAY

im on the hunt for cock and for some reason a picture of some dead chick getting sexed comes up so i clicked it, but i couldnt find it on that page. what i did find however is a whole heap of cool pics interspersed with pics of dead looking people and people shitting. so this guy has many and varied tastes, but he's also found a lot of really cool photos.
and also so very good advice

"may be applied beneficially to any part of the body"

anyway, if you have a bit of time, scroll through. i dont know what it says as its in another language but the pics are interesting

brb, i need to call my vibrator dealer

i had a fun day yesterday. after starting the day with two crying boys and nothing that could be done to sedate them, i got rid of them by posting them off to their grandmothers house for the night. i then contemplated going to bed as i had a headache, no doubt caused by the constant whining of a 4 year old and 6 year old. they whine, you know. did you know that? now you do. geoff and tina? congratulations, but get ready for the whining. instead i decided to go buy a backpack.
at the end of august im jetting off to sunny melbourne to visit the beautiful theresa and the lovely adrian. woohoo!!! last time i went i took a hot wheels back pack. and while that did the job, it was a bit...hot wheels, so i have invested my hard earned cash in a new one that is mine, all mine!
i met up with basil and micki at harbour town and found a backpack for $8.45. yep. i am the bargain hunter. i also bought jumpers for x as there are no size 6/7 jumpers anywhere around here.

then, have a guess where we went after that??? go on, guess. no! no cheating, dont go visit their blogs. guess first. nope, wrong! we went to the plaster fun house. i painted a fish and i called him gil. like steve martin from parenthood.

then we went to the hogs breath for dinner and they tried to charge us for garlic bread and wine! how dare they! ok, we ate the garlic bread, but we never ordered it. and the wine, that belonged to the family who we had to sit right next to even though we were the only two lots of people in the restaurant.

we then headed back to my place to watch amelie and it is without a doubt my favourite movie ever.

i cant wait to watch big brother tonight. its time to go....thatcher birdcunt

p.s. this post wouldnt have been possible without the talents of the wonderfully buxom jessculture who i hope to rub against in melbourne, and the equally wonderful, his fopness

tv

man, neighbours was really good tonight. i havent watched it for ages, but from what i can gather paul is a cuntface and everyone hates him and annaliese is making a film. does that sound about right? good.
now the coolest thing about tonights episode of neighbours was that the flim was about annalieses time on ramsay street, so it showed all these people who used to live there. billy! libby and darren! amy! it was great. and lance was there again and he got a good line like he always used to. something about a fat man with a beard, aimed at toady, aaah, neighbours

you know what else has been fucking ace? doctor who. its been rad. yeah. im so good with those things, you know, what explain stuff? yeah, words

things so far that make me think this might be ok

he offered to pick me up from the airport
he likes cuddles
he knows about astrology
he likes trains
he remembers tv shows from after school
i told him i tell lies and he listened instead of being angry
he's willing to dance like bruce springsteen for me

things so far that make me think his might not be ok

charley's aunt - minus fanny babbs

got a message from harry this morning. the guy who was playing lord fancourt babberly isnt able to stay with the production and it'll have to be cancelled if we cant find someone. its a big role, and it involves putting on a dress.
is there anyone out there who thinks they could do this? a comedic role, you'll be playing a college chap who helps to get the girls with the boys and resists the hands of the boys fathers when they propose.

however confusing, its all pretty funny and we need someone for the role. let me know if you're interested and i'll give you more info.

oh, you end up with a girl in the end, too, so nobody misses out

fully sick

you know when thorpey said that uncle tobys ot's cereal and milk bars were fully sick? well he was right. they taste quite a lot like vomit

not much like dick tho

p.s. girls are pretty crap at drawing cocks, huh

i really thought i was over it

The Music Next Door

A week went by, and then another
And not a word from you
I remember when a day would be unusual...

As a month unfolded into a few
I thought of you now and then
I glimpsed you once but you were gone again
When the autumn turned to winter
As autumn ought to do
I thought Oh! What if the sun never shone
And then you sprang to mind unbidden
When it didn’t

the lucksmiths

where i would be tonight if i could

We argued on the channel train to Paris
The vin rouge helped us make it sweet again
But by the time that we got down to Lyon
Everything I said was wrong and you cursed me in the rain
We split up for a while in Barcelona
We met up six days later in Madrid
I was hoping that the break would make things go a little better
And for a little while it almost did
Now I'm in a bar in Copenhagen
Trying hard to forget your name
And I'm staring at the label on a bottle of cerveza
And every fucking city feels the same

You said to call you when I got to London
A French girl told me that you'd left a note
I said to her "I like your accent" and she thought I sounded funny
So we ended up drinking in Soho
Foolishly I followed you to Dublin
Like a ghost I walked the streets of Temple Bar
And all the bright young things were throwing up their Guinness in the gutters
And once I thought I saw you from afar
Now I'm in a nightclub in Helsinki
And they're playing La Vida Loca once again
And I can't believe I'm dancing to this crap but I'm a chance here
Yeah, every fucking city sounds the same

At a cafe in the port of Amsterdam
An E-mail from you said you'd gone to Rome
For a minute I thought maybe but my funds were running low
And anyway it sounded like you weren't alone
So I headed north and until I got to Hamburg
A chilly city suits a troubled soul
And on the Reeperbahn I paid a woman far too much
To kick me out before I'd even reached my goal
Now I'm in a restaurant in Stockholm
And the waiter here wants me to know his name
And I can order sandwiches in seven different languages
But every fucking city looks the same
Arriverderci, au revoir, aufwiedersen, hasta la vista
Yeah, every fucking city's just the same

paul kelly is playing at the gov tonight and i promised myself i would be there the next time he played in adelaide. bad carly

i promise promise the next time he's in adelaide i'll go see him

not a harlott

i got a phone call from harry last night. he'd like me to come round to his house for a reading tomorrow night and to read for the part of kitty in opus' new production of charleys aunt.

'it might be a bit of a stretch for you though, you'll have to work hard'
'um, ok' see, i'd read a summary and it seems like a walk in the park. a very proper, english park where i'd be walking with my chaperone and the birds would be singing most prettily.
'yes, she's actually a very nice girl, not a harlot at all'

aaaaaahahaha, you're so funny harry. so to keep up that whole persona, when i found out i'd be playing against nathan:
'i was hoping for another guy cos i've already kissed nathan. i wouldnt mind adding to my list of boys' this one, for instance

i dont understand rappers

on the way home from the chemist and a song comes on the radio...taking it back, 19th century style. what the? i think. and then it begins

who's that?
who's that?
who's that rappin at my chamber door?
it's mr
mr raven
all up in my grill like never more

all. up. in. my. grill. like. nevermore.

what the hell does that mean?

and arent rappers supposed to be all individual and whatever, yet their songs are full of similies. is that what they're called, when your compare something to another?

examples from this fantastic song:
Cell phone mute like Paris Hilton
Times a changing like Bob Dylan
killing me softly like the Fugees
joy inverse just like Fred Durst
Afflicted calm, like Michael Moore

it then ends with 'who's house? ravens house'

i hope never to hear that song again

why was i at the chemist, you ask? well, as you will already know i am quite partial to chemists. i like them for things. you know, things? and stuff, they're good for stuff too. like newsagents and the australia post shop, all good for stuff. anyway, why was i there? cos the cats gave me ringworm. 'but its ok,' said the chemist lady, 'its a horrible name for something that isnt realy that bad. its actually a fungal infection which sounds so much nicer'

yes, that does sound nicer, almost pleasant

stolen from adrian

5 snacks I enjoy

cereal, chocolate, cheese and crackers, toast, custard penis

5 songs I know the words to even w/out the music
most beatles, lemonheads, nirvana, you am i, and candle record bands.

i could also probably sing you the entire wish album by the cure. i used to imagine going to a cure concert and having them play wish from beginning to end. that would be amazing

5 games I like

spider solitaire, nature park on my mobile, mah jong quest, banjo kazooie, baulderdash (actually a board game, personalised nose armour, bwaahahahaha)

5 albums that changed my life

sound as ever,hi fi way,hourly daily-you am i, nevermind-nirvana, certain candle records albums,

5 things I would buy w/one Thousand Dollars

jeans that fit me, socks, someone to clean my house, dvds, cds

My top 5 guilty pleasures

sleep, books, internet, mint areo bars, a feel good iced coffee everytime i go grocery shopping

5 top musicians lately (who's in the cd player)

anthony atkinson, elliott smith, lucksmiths, candle sampler, brendan benson

Top 5 locations I would like to run away to

melbourne, tasmania, copenhagen, port willunga, sleep

5 things I would never wear

paul (aaaahahahahaha, sure does!), those ridiculous pants bottoms, you know, ravers wear them. am i a raver? no. oh i dont know. i didnt think id wear a skirt over pants but i have. how about socks and thongs

5 TV shows I like

criminal intent, well, all the law and orders, all saints, queer as folk, myth busters, love is a four letter word (bring it back, abc!!!!!)

um

jehovah's witnesses just came to my door

the girl said hello, held up the magazine, and i said, 'oh, no thanks'

the girl smiled and said, 'no worries, seeya' and walked off

without a fight

is the world turning into something better??

ahem

2 mint chocolate aero bars in a *mixed* pack of chcolate and mint chocolate aero bars is more a mistake, rather than a mix

cute

adrian just rang me from work. i feel a little more even with him now in terms of how well we know each other.

i still havent seen him naked tho

its my life

and if i want to spend tonight eating camembert, i have every right

ALLAN!!!

get a life, you fuckhead. and if its broke, thinking that you're being smart and sneaky? for fucks sake. retard sandwhiches, much? werent you moving out cos he was such a cockhead? why dont you both get on with your lives and take care of your kids.

i will have to smack the both of you if this continues

what the fuck???

i finished harry potter and the half blood prince last night. a few things that happened, i was thinking, ok, its about time, but the biggest thing????


what the fuck?????

the crap, the ...oh, and the yay

so a few things happened today. i was talking to janine on the phone and she said someone form my work was bitching and comlaining about me today. feh on her, i say! apparently she is the kind of person to take the smallest thing you've done, blow it out of proportion and take it to management as a complaint. she sucks arse. theres the crap

the ...oh, was when vicki and i went to wendys and the boy who served me (his badge said jam Ez) said 'i think i saw you in a play over at the theatre' and i said, 'you probably did..oh, hang on..which one?' and he smiled, and i said, 'it was equus, wasnt it?' and he smiled and said yeah it was, but that he thought it must have taken a lot of courage to get up there and do what i did, and that it was really good.

now, you may think that was the yay, but it wasnt. the yay was that he put extra choc mint aero bar on my thickshake cos i asked so nicely*


*and maybe cos he'd seen me naked, who knows

ooo woah ho ooh

my boobs are getting bigger

repercussions

i though the kids were dealing really well with the break up of me and personwhosnameimustnevermention. e had become a little clingy and extra excited to see the other parent, but that was ok to deal with. x was quite excited and said that there were a few kids in his class who had two houses to live in, so he and these other kids were kind of in a gang. i remember when my mum and dad split up and we had to write our 'on the weekend' stories every monday morning, i would write that i went to dad and 'aunty' lyn's house. not dad and his new girlfriend. im sure my teachers knew what i meant, or else they would have wondered why my father was spending a lot of time with my aunty. i tried to hide it, i dont know that i was ashamed...maybe just a little worried what people would think. but x seems fine with that, talking to his friends about it and seeming pretty happy

then yesterday marc told me that he had x at vacation care with him, and some kids asked him how he knew marc. x got flustered and said that marc was his mum, and then got really embarrassed. personwhosnameimustnevermention and marc have tried talking to him since then but he just clams up and gets defensive, saying he just forgot for a little while and that he knows who his mum is.

im waiting till he asks me who his dad is at my house.

im going to have to be really careful about who i bring home and when, even if its all above board and friends, it might mess with x's brain too much and he's such a sensitive boy as it is, i couldnt bear causing him any more pain

obsessed much?

i was ready to go about half an hour early this morning, so what did i do with my time?

did i tidy up my bedroom? no
did i finish the dishes i started on tuesday? no
did i hang out the washing that has been in the machine since wednesday morning? no

i went online and checked all the blogs in my links

smash

break

go on

i dare you to only play for 10 seconds

if i was allowed to cut the top off of the ugly pine tree my washing would be dry by now

amusing

and tasty

hey, you...check this guy out...you, check this guy out

ok, its not a guy, but has anyone else heard that jay and the doctor promo on triple j and thought that it sounds really dumb? anyway

8.3

go me

i think i actually look really dumb in that photo. all squinty and wrong, but hey, whatever tickles your fancy

by the way, what *does* tickle your fancy?

on another note:

dear air,
why are you so cold? why do you insist on breaking into my home and filling it with a chill that makes every exposed part of skin in my body freeze, and all covered parts shiver?
its just downright mean, you should be more considerate

love from carly

scared to move

things come in threes

ok, i opened a can of coup. all i did was pull the ring pull thing and it exploded.

i opened the freezer and it hissed at me

whats going to happen next?

trouble

the trouble is, he wrote back and it was exactly what i thought he would write. and now he's flown off and is spending a romantic week away. a second thought of me? i dont think so.

finish it off with some advice about going for the library boy. well, thats all well and good. why dont i go for someone i dont like that way, should be fine. we've had this conversation. i told you. i told you how i should have stayed and pretended for the rest of my life. stayed away from you. pretended what i felt wasnt there. that way, you see, i wouldnt hurt anyone.

but you would hurt you, you said

the thing is though, its hurting me now. you're closer than you have been in a month and you've never felt so far away. and i know for certain now that there is a less than zero chance of anything happening with us, let alone of me even catching a glimpse of you again...so why cant i just give up? why cant i say to myself, its ok, i dont need someone to share part of my life with.

why did that part of my heart give the nod and come out with that word.

stupid word

all it does is hurt people, as much as it makes them feel good

bye simon

ha!


i would like to take this opportunity to say that i assisted in getting dean out of the house. i know, i know, you can thank me later.

so, i got rid of dean, ive had my shot of goran for the week, now im off to curl up in bed with daniel radcliffe the new harry potter book

i would like to thank the wonderful jessculture for the pic, and me, for learning how to strike through text

cyster

i just heard a song on the raido and i was very sure the girl said 'have you seen my cyst?' and i was thinking, what an odd thing to ask and to be singing about. then i figured out she meant sister. uhuh

so, friday night. if any of you out there havent seen sarah blasko, i reccommend doing anything within your power to do so right now. actually, if you need to go 'without' your power, go right ahead and do it because seeing this girl perform is of the utmost importance and should be on all your to do lists. she's definatley on my to do list, mehehe

vicki and ember picked me up and we all drove to fowlers in the city. it was quite full already when we got there, but we met up with sharyn and kirsty and managed to find a couple of couches upstairs to sit down and talk.
ember went to find a friend of hers and quite soon after that vicki decided she needed to go find ember, aka, find something interesting to do, and left sharyn, kirsty and i to chat away. it was good to catch up with kirsty again. i dont think ive spoken to her properly in over a year. the last time i saw her, i was serving a customer and she had her mouth full of food so all we could do was wave to each other. she and tim have been together for 10 years. wow.

we sat for a while until i saw him. cute library boy had walked up the stairs, looked around, and walked back down again. after some initial prompting from kirsty and sharyn, i ventured downstairs and said hi. he seemed pleased to see me and we had a good talk. he's scottish and he's been in adelaide for 8 years, plays drums and is learning guitar. not too bad at all.

we watched a bit of straight to video who were pretty cool. quite experimental with a lot of instrumental songs. they were good at what they did. i dunno if i could watch a whole set...maybe i need a cd to listen to, to get to know the songs first. still, they were entertaining.

78 saab were great. really rocking and had some nice acoustic moments. their percussion/keyboard player has, without a doubt, the best hat in rock and roll. i wonder if i can find a pic. i'll go look.
it looks like nothing you can buy. almost like he grabbed a piece of stiff white material, fashioned it into some sort of cowboy hat shape, and attached it to his head with a black band. the photo doesnt do it any justice. its pulled so far down in the front, he has to lean all the way back to see anything. and it looks like a flat skinny arse on top of his head. fashion!

sarah blasko


wow

i really dont hink i ca write about her, as what i say will in no way, show you how brilliant, talented and beautiful she is. she has the most amazing voice, is super cute, and dances all over the place. the rest of her band were really good too, and the samples that made up some of the songs were exo.

after we were all transported to neverland by the beauty that is miss sarah blasko, sharyn, kirsty, james an i went looking for coffee. if you are ever in adelaide looking for coffee, i in NO WAY WHATSOEVER reccommend australias pizza house on hindley street. the girl had no idea. we ( when i say we, i mean me................................and then sharyn and kirsty) were handed out cakes/slices with no cutlery. and when we asked she had this odd look on her face like, fork? you want a whatnow?. we ended up getting a small plastic spoon each that was pointless against the slices, but worked well with my baked lemon cheesecake. we all eventually got our drinks too, after a very long wait. james and i had a cappicino each which was luke warm, and shazz and kirsty got a hot chocolate which kirsty couldnt finish on acount of its grossness.

australian pizza house on west terrace and on...whatever other street it is, on the east side of the city, make good pizza, garlic bread, and im told, vegemite damper. they are not the place to go if you want coffee of any drinkableness.

james walked us to the car and i git a hug and a kiss on the cheek. say it with me, oooOOOOoooo

now all i have to do is actually like him that way

again, it is entirely too cold to be sitting here in my new size 12 skirt. did i mention it was a size 12? its a size 12. go me

im off to make some soup, sit down, and enjoy mary poppins all by myself

sarah blasko

absolutley aweinspiringly beautiful and amazing

more later

stupid optus

my mobile is ringing.
'hello, is ts carly?'
'yes'
'this is optus mobile calling, and since you have been so loyal in staying with us for your mobile phone calls, we would like to reward you with an extra $5 credit on your mobile bill'
'ok'
'all you have to do is try optus for your home phone...you're with telstra, i gather?'
'...no...im already with optus'
'..........oh........well, ok then.......bye'

we hang up

shouldnt that be something they know? shouldnt they have that up on my screen when they look up my info to get my number?

people are stupid

internet explorer sucks

so if any of you are looking at my blog on IE, it'll look crappily lame. you should all go and download mozilla firefox cos its radder and my blog looks cool on it

best wishes,
carly

bloggity bloggity fun

see all this new layout and pics stuff? well, apart from sticking the pic up the top, which vicki did*, i did all of it by myself. im turning into quite the nerd

*vicki took the pic as well, you can see more of the lesbian photo shoot, starring me and april, here...actually, no you cant...vicki, what did you do with the lesbian pics?

thanks a fucking lot channel seven

is all saints going to be on any time soon or is boring cricket going to be on my tv all night??

wanted

some heat, please

eli - today

today is playing at being a policeman

wearing my bra so he can have 'big boobs', he is galloping around the house on an imaginary zebra, holding a basket of plastic things he says are flowers

sarah blasko



i cant wait. on friday night i'll be seeing sarah blasko at fowlers and i am quite sure its going to be fantastic.vicki, sharyn, kirsty, ember, james, possibly kent are going to be there and i'm just really excited about it. her songs really get me, like i was trying to explain before how i want people to really listen to songs

You've got a way
that makes the darkness light
the earth seem holy
spark in your eye
ignites the fire in my heart

my fever is high
my throat is dry
whenever you're around me
it's in your way my love
that always unbounds

it's in the way you move me darling
it's in the way you come and go
it's in the way the colours are drifting slowly
it's in the way
it's in the way

right when i thought
my life was mine
my heart was working for me
i realised this blood
was flowing for you

coz your ways
have made the seasons fade
into an endless summer
the coldness of winter only felt
when you're gone

it's in the way you move me darling
it's in the way you come and go
it's in the way the colours are drifting slowly
it's in the way
it's in the way

coz hours seem to disappear
when we are together
coz when you're near
the words seem clear
and i am brought to life
life
life

it's in the way you move me darling
it's in the way you come and go
it's in the way the colours are drifting slowly
it's in the way
it's in the way

it's in the way you move me darling
it's in the way you come and go
it's in the way the colours are drifting slowly
it's in your way
it's in your way alright
alright

it's in the way you move me darling

please?

somebody find me this movie?

for those of you who cant seem to see it over there ->

sometimes

ok, everytime i drive my car, i drum to the beat of the music i am listeing to. except i do it with my feet. which should be on the pedals

~

in other news, presidential bicycle is about the funniest thing i've heard all week

i propose the best course of action to be everyone coming around my house and cleaning it while i go to sleep

kill me now

im singing easy lover by phil collins. anyone got a chainsaw?

whats everyine doing tonight? oh! that first question has nothing to do with the second one

see me?

i'm zooming from page to page, clicking anywhere i want and its all keeping up (until my computer froze, but its crap so we just say crapo! and move on) but see me? my computer is finally keeping up with the speed of my clicks. i've opened all the adelaide blogs on my links list and it hasnt died yet. oh so speedy

broadband, i love you

i went out after work and saw peaking in tongues with vicki, kirsty and her lesbian lover annie. annie's cute. she's not really a lesbian, but dont you worry your pretty little heads about that. as soon as i got home i turned my computer on and loaded up the broadband that i have been waiting weeks to arrive because silly people cannot follow deliver instructions.

i love it

im such a nerd

somebody call me, i can talk to you *and* be online at the same time

speaking in tongues was realy good. it was the stage version of lantana and i loved the movie so i had a feeling i would like theplay, if it was acted well, and it was.

we had tea at cafe bon journo on the way. the waitress stabbed me with a knife and said 'it wasnt me'. hehehe. she was cute

and tonight we're going to see the taming of the shrew at burnside. it'll be good to see everyone again. lochie said about half the cast is from midsummers

ugh. someone has parked their car across the road from mine and is listening to bad *bad* dance music. tell it i hate it

well, it says its 12:46 on my computer which means ive been up for all of 46 minutes, so i might go back to bed. today is the only day of the week where i can do absolutely anything i want to and i dont have to worry about picking this person up or going to work or anything like that. the cats have been fed and now they're chasing each other around the table so they'll be happy for a while.
i have the lemony snickett books 6, 7 and 8 and i'm going to read them

cheerio and tata

update

hot library boy is getting a ticket to sarah blasko for next friday night, now that he knows which night i'm going

his birthday is the day before mine

oh!

book sale at my library!

paperbacks for 20c and hard cover books for 50c. some a little more expensive but not many. and there'll be toys and jigsaws too

hub library from the 9th till....the 22nd i think, come say hi!

things you may or may not know about me

a lot of people have a 100 things section on their blogs. im sure i could write down 100 things about me. i know stuff about me. well, some stuff anyway. but im not going to write 100 things, just enough until my hands get too cold and i have to go to bed

*i just ate 6 mini milky way bars
*i find going to the toilet very boring and will take something with me pretty much everytime. generally i'll play nature park on my phone
*i have 2 gmails accounts but can only access 1
*i am currently wearing pyjama pants with feet
*i know of someone called brooke who is completely delusional
*i always fall for people i cant have
*i want vincent d'onofrio (you knew that? its common knowledge? oooh, he told you about us, didnt he? he's so cute, cant keep it to himself :P)
*i steal quite often
*generally things i dont really need
*i can never explain what it is i need
*i have trouble remembering certain words. i would tell you what they are but i've forgotten
*sleeping is my favourite thing to do
*laying in bed and reading and being able to fall asleep and wake up and start reading again whenever i want is another of my favourite things
*amelie is my favourite film at the moment
*my favourite film could change at any moment
*my fingers are getting really cold
*my mum once designed a pair of gloves that she called mouse mittens that kept your hands warm while on the computer, they were thin enough that you could still type. she even went so far as to speak to the patent place. she never did anything about it
*i could really do with some mouse mittens right now
*or more cats, since the two places on my lap under my two cats are very warm
*there are some people i wish i could shake some sense into
*i am one of those people
*there are some songs that i wish i could play to people and they would just...get it
*i dont know what *it* is, maybe its one of those words i can never remember

from 'fiction', by the lucksmiths

Invited to a barbecue
I found refuge in the kitchen
Discussing post-war US literature
With a girl whose upper arm read “fiction”
Like it might have been typewritten

I asked her its significance
She said she sometimes took reminding
What she wanted to be doing
Whether reading it or writing
I admitted admiration
For both typeface and intent
And said more softly — sotto voce —
I knew too well what she meant
She just smiled
And in a while she went

um

i'm not sure how true this is, but i got an email saying i've made it to the final in a poetry competition on poetry.com


i cant add it up
you + her + me
when i need the answer to be 2
it keeps equaling 3

but i was never as good at maths
as i was at thinking about you

perhaps i should have majored in dreams
with a minor in fantasy
and a thesis on what could be

instead i sit with pen and paper
a pocket calculator
and work out the equations one more time

gems from the 6 year old

a sunny morning, marc, x (holding a tennis ball) and e are walking down the road, a dog is barking at them as they walk past

marc: hey dog, shoosh, its ok
x: oh! i forgot, i can speak dog
marc: yeah? so what's he saying?
x: he's saying, 'hey, arsehole, give me the ball!'

you know cleaning?

i'm over it

more de ja vu

i know i've already posted these lyrics but i need to post them again

end credits

so it came screaming to a halt
jumped out of the drivers seat this isn't what she wants
god gets out his irony stick and beats me to a pulp
are you happy?
are you happy now?

because i want you to be here again
because i want you to be here again...again

and all the most purile songs made sense
everything conspires to make me think of you again
i go down down baby, down down the rollercoaster
sweet sweet baby, how can you let me go?
are you happy now?

because i want you to be here again
because i want you to be here again

because it's not enough just to be someone who comes and goes
you read my books and you wore my clothes
you've seen so much and you've let me go
because it's not enough just to be around when you need a laugh
i can feel the connection fading fast
can't accept it's the way we are

are you happy?
are you happy now?
do you love me?
even if you don't want me anymore?

because i want you to be here again
because i want you to be here again

because it's not enough just to be someone who comes and goes
you read my books and you wore my clothes
you've seen so much, now you've let me go
do you love me?
do you love me now?
well, are you happy?
even if you don't want me anymore

career girls

this is the sort of thing which makes me love matthew baldwin so much

de ja who?

as you would have read below, i have already written this post and it disappeared when my computer fucked itself with a stick with nails in it. i will attempt to rewrite what i wrote earlier.

ahem

so i made it home in one piece. i was sure macdonalds opened at 5 am but perhaps thats just because i wanted a coffee and knew i wouldnt be bothered making one when i got home, and knew i couldnt be bothered getting out of the car to get one from the servo.

i sat in enigma for about half an hour when i first got to the city. supermild was still 21sting and it was warm there. also i was looking for adrian since i knew he'd be there seeing the hardons. instead of finding adrian, i looked around and was suddenly transported into bizarro de ja vu world. it was like i was at bands again, but everyone was about 8 years older. all these faces i recognised, just older, with shorter hair and a bit more grown up. instead of dreadlocks there were mowhawks. instead of underaged surfer girls there were goths. instead of hearing the sounds of waves crashing, i heard cars trolling down hindley street.

after i settled myself into a comfy lounge at supermild, and started on my watermelon/cranberry/some sort of alcohol concoction, i was messaged by noranna, saying she couldnt make it. so i said, ok then, and 5 minutes later she called and said she was coming. hooray! and who should turn up just after noranna, but daniel.

the three of us spent a nice night chatting about the fact that all three of us want someone we cant have. and funnily enough, these three cant haves have all, in one way or another, given the suggestion that they do have some sort of feelings for us. stupid cant haves. you're all not fair. apart from bitching about things we cant have, we looked at breasts.

so i finally met noranna after standing behind her at darren hanlon and not realising it. i also met jessie and dj craig and got a couple of lovely messages from kent. you promised, remember kent? next time you'll be dancey dancey with us, ok?

poor little jessie was one of the cute girls in this photo. she said she was scared of the boys. see the boys? they are so indie. arent they so indie? look at them. just look at them, will you?! you can just see them air guitaring to jet and the strokes, flicking their hair and then straightening it again. so indie. wow

she should not worry about the indie boys, for they were silly little boys who only knew about drinking beer and air guitaring, not how to pleasure a woman the way she needs. although, i have it on good authority the one with the black t shirt pashed 4 girls in one hour. that must be some sort of record. kinda like seven with one blow.

so that was my account of last night. not as good as the first time i wrote it, but when a piece of wood with nails in it wants to have sex with you, you kinda have to bend over and take it.

thanks to noranna for hanging out with me, it was nice to meet you at last. thanks to dj craig for a great night, and for playing the lemonheads even though no one really knew how to dance to it. thanks to kent for making me smile with cute messages. and thanks to adrian for thinking im sweet even though i didnt find you. you should give me your number *wink* *

* in a really non creepy way

p.s. would you look at my hair? its very red. go me

fuckers!

i had a whole huge post about last night, complete with photos and links and everything, and then my computer went and fucked itself* and now its gone

you're all gonna have to wait now. im grumpy and cold and i want soup and goran

*with a a stick...with nails in it

want to know something stalkerish?

i am standing in the enigma bar right now, and right at this moment, adrian is probably standing in here too and he doesnt even know it. ok, not so stalkerish...yet...cos after i hot publish i'm gonna go looking for him.

i walked in on the speeches for a 21st party at supermild about 30 seconds ago. that was pretty funny. well, it amused me anyway.

so this is the start of my all by myself adventure into the city and i'm already looking for people.

loser? why yes

i dont *think* i signed anything that said i wouldnt look up a cute boys record and see if his mobile is on it...