hand it over!

i went to my mums house this morning on my way home. after a couple of cuppas and some toast she handed me the things that she'd saved up for me over the last couple of weeks, and i put them in my bag.

then she said, 'wouldnt it be funny if the police pulled you over and asked you to empty out your handbag?'
and i said 'or if i was walking downt the orad and got mugged, wouldnt they be disappointed'

here are the contents of my handbag today



it was then i realised i would never be a proper mum, with the tissues and the bandaids and other assorted things a child may or may not need at any given hour of the day or night

1. my bag. originally priced at $29.95, i was definately in the right place at the right time when i scored this baby. when i bought it, it was marked down to $5.04 until someone realised their mistake and were repriced at $20.04.

2 and 3. moisturiser and soap my mum has gotten for free from work thinking that someone might want it at some stage (please see above, where i said i would never be the kind of mum who carries those sorts of things around)

4 and 5. deoderant and hair removal gel. spent the night at toms. had to do my legs and ran out of time at home, therefore, hair removal products travelled with me

6. potato masher

7. jila min...hang on, what the? potato masher? yes. go mum, again. i mentioned that i have lost my potato masher. i realise this is a stupid thing to do and in all probability, quite hard to do. a potato masher is not something that just disappears. mum doesnt have mashed potatos, and therefore, does not need a potato masher. the 30 year old instrument has been handed down. it has become an heirloom. get excited kids, one day it shall be yours

7. jila mints. two packs for 50 cents? yes please

8. purse. possibly the only thing worthy of stealing in the entire bag. you cant really see it in the pic, but theres actually a ten dollar note sticking out the top. yep. im rolling in the cash

9. beaded bracelet. you never know when you may feel the need to wear one

10. mobile phone. speaks for itself really. ha! no it doesnt, its a tool you use to speak to other people!

11. tampons. self explanatory

12. badges. the shins! garden state! i checked my letter box about a month ago and these were in there. i still havent taken them out although ive worn them occasionally and just put them back in my bag.

13. STA travel business card. one of the places tom and i looked for plane tickets. if anyone knows of a good travel agent, could you let me know? thanks

14. fringe guide. as with the last item, if anyone knows of a good show to go to this saturday night, please let me know. im in need of somewhere to go to celebrate my birthday

15. two different types of lip stuff, watermelon and vanilla. because you never know what mood your lips will be in