update

found the carrot - on the other side of the yard

broke up with adam

ate a block of chocolate

am on the third level of beatles rock band

not even kidding

just went out the back to nibble on the carrot e left for the reindeer, and its gone

seriously

and when i came back to my computer after the kids had been on it earlier, e had googled 'is e on the nice list?' fucking love that kid. shame i cant take photos of him, or the other lovely wide awake fellow, since my camera doesnt work :(

now i have to go make a cup of tea for father christmas to drink. people who do a tough job like delivering presents to every single house in the world deserve a cup of tea, apparently. and apparently he does it street by street with some sort of rocket launcher, not alphabetically, as this wouldnt be very good time management. he also employs some parents to to the gift delivering for him, by calling them on the phone to ask them

not everyone gets presents tho. stupid cats are on the naughty list this year for all the starlings and pigeons they've eaten, and for the fact that i'll no doubt have to take banjo to emergency some time over the next couple of days due to the fact that she has one eye closed and some sort of puncture wound in her leg, and squeaky meows when i pick her up. naughty list, indeed!

well, thats it then, i guess

i am not impressed by your news that you caught a goat and are now cooking it

although, i could catch a monkey - if i was starving i could. different frogs, different days.

lies

e asked me what honesty meant. i said 'not telling lies'.
'im not honesty then'
'why not? did you tell a lie?'
nods
'what did you say?'
'i told everyone i was the penguin from happy feet'

things my child did to annoy me in a 10 minute period

forgot how to make a cup of tea : this involved not boiling the water, filling the cup full of milk, realising what he'd done and attempting to tip the milk back into the carton, giving up and getting another cup in which he poured boiling water into without first adding the tea bag, then using milk from the carton rather than the milk he'd previously used to fill the other cup.

then spilled it as he walked into the lounge

then spilled it again as he put it on the coffee table

then spilled it again as he was mopping up the other spills.

unrelated things

e found an earwig in his bed. 'oh my god! grandma was right! there are bugs in here!'. children are currently cleaning their room

today i found out tom nook is buying turnips for 318 bells. i sold mine yesterday for 116 bells. and i had a darryl braithwaite song stuck in my head. fml.

trying

so, we're trying. apparently. i dont know. sometimes it seems its not any different than before. and i see other people trying and i wonder if its all for show. its such public trying that it seems its all done to prove that everything is gonna be alright

im doing my trying quietly, at home, with no spectators. i dont know if its working. maybe. i kept checking my phone. but then the question came, 'do you want me to?' and i didnt know how to answer it. to be honest i cant remember how i answered it. i guess i'll find out in a week or so. 'otherwise it will be ages' is the reason. and yes, otherwise, it will be ages, but maybe thats what we need? or maybe what we need is more time closer together to work things out? but what if that closer together time makes us angry and quiet? i guess i'll have the answer then, wont i.

i keep getting asked how i am. and i dont know how to answer that. im fine. at least, i feel fine, but i know im not. i dont know if that makes any sense at all. im barely speaking, but i think thats a good thing, since no one is home. but thats a problem too, as i should probably be going out. but its so hot... just going to work is enough, really.

but my initial reason for writing, trying. im just not sure i know how to

oops

broke my blog

dear fast food chain

i fail to see how this qualifies to be a whole crispy strip

usually if they are small, you add another one. this time you didnt. thankfully i wasnt hugely hungry. you really should put the sauce in there though, its mean to ask me what sauce i want and then not give it to me

on the up side, the sunkist can is pretty



dear another fast food chain

do you think its possible for you to put a sign out the front of your stores to say when you are cleaning the ice cream machines, so i dont have to go through the drive through to find out i can have any cold milky beverages? its rather annoying, and i always think of how much further down the road i could be if i didnt stop. if i had a thickshake or an icecream, i wouldnt mind so much. or perhaps, you could have two machines that work on a roster system so that there is always icecream available? thats an idea. i doubt you're lacking in cash.

lastly, not related to fast food, but stuck on my fridge so still in some way related to food, this is what greets me every time i go into the kitchen

the internet is mocking me

facebook suggests i 'reconnect with adam'
email i just received tells me to visit britain again
a time capsule photo gets sent to me every now and then. todays is from 2006

in a style that is very strange for me, i was awake last night at 3am. ho ho ho, carly, you are a funny one. actually though, instead of being awake and angry at being awake and trying to sleep, i was writing.
ive been trying to write this song for a bit over a week now. its been in bits and pieces on paper and phones all around my bed. last night it all came together

every trick in the book

Hold on tight, you're needed now.
Dont let go of me.
The cold hard light of day didnt chase those thoughts away.
In fact it set them free.
Now im trying hard to feel how im expected to feel.
Waking up to the disappointment of what is real.

I kept the message that you sent me.
Remembering, imagining, hoping yes and no.
Remember how i said that i dared you?
Tell me, i'll stop if you say so.

I dont know what it was that i was looking for, but it was comfort that i
found.
And now those constant thoughts have hit my head with such a
force, they're spinning me around.

And though i couldnt have you, i wanted you to want me.
Watch me from your side of the room.
And thats the way we played our little parts in this game,
as responsible adults its what we do.

Is it the start of a pattern, or just a strange coincidence
when our fingers reach out at the same time?

im going to attempt a little more tidying today. see how it goes

apparently i'm missed

yeah. i havent been blogging, i know. sorry. to be honest, i didnt think anyone read this anyway, and it was just a page i used to keep all the sites i like to look at on one place. but thank you, if you do check back some times, for thinking of me

melbourne was great.
























the end

no, not really, but the pictures pretty much cover it

as you can see, there was driving, sleeping, bike riding, hat wearing, grammar/spelling correction, dolls, more driving, and more sleeping, but in a little more detail -

it was a very long drive. 7 people in an 8 seater tarago. 7 peoples bags, instruments and sexual innuendo.... so it was fun :) plus we made mixed cds which were super great.

after driving all day, we went straight to the venue which was awesome. gertrudes brown couch. you should go there. and we played with some amazing bands

owls of the swamp, and the tequila mockingbirds

listen to them, see them if they play, become their friends, they're lovely. hopefully they'll be coming to adelaide for next years format festival, so you should definitely listen out for that. hopefully humble bee and cheer advisory council will play too, and it;ll be a like a big reunion, aaaw.

so, friday night involved playing, pizza and panadol, then sleep. and saturday was all about awesome breakfast and garage sales. places like northcote make me wish i lived in melbourne sometimes. but i'd always miss adelaide.

saturday afternoon, humble bee played at idgaff with charles baby. he's a very sweet person, pays wonderfully, and sings beautifully. you should check him out too. possibly at format.

so, we played to a handful of people, the majority of whom were my band, and then we went out for ethiopian food. hell yeah. tasty as. after that we ended up at the old bar, i think? to see more bands. i was told by two male members of my band that the beer garden was full of hot young things. i didnt look out there, so i cannot comment. i can say that the 'things' i saw, were all aged around 13 and must have had fake IDs. before we even walked in, i heard on of the funniest things from the trip

bouncer: this you?
girl: yeah, i cut my hair
bouncer: lost a bit of weight too!

i know! who knew dogs could talk?!?!

saturday night was also where the grammar/spelling correction occurred.

sunday was driving. driving driving driving. very slow driving at first, since the marathon made it so that it took an hour to cross the city, but we eventually made it

we stopped in a town, somewhere, for lunch, and discovered that everyone in our band has a secret idea to open a cafe/gig venue/ art gallery/ thing. cheer advisory cafe, here we come! we also stoppped for free tea and coffee where ben proclaimed 'fuck it! im buying the lesbian book'. another highlight, especially for the grandmas running the shop

sunday night, we were still driving, i picked up adam, came home, kissed my kids and fell asleep. mmmmmm, my own bed

the following weekend, the council played the adelaide cd launch. you can listen to the songs at teh myspace, and buy a cd from us for$5. $5! you'd be crazy not to. we played with the british robots and the honey pies who are spectacularly awesome and amazing and it was a really fun, wonderful night, for many reasons.i had good talks with lots of people i dont really talk to, other than 'hey, how're you doing', and the entire band received a marriage proposal. cant ask for more than that

we played at the exeter friday night. i drank two shandys. it was a good night

please listen to noah and the whale

what you have to remember, and i need to constantly remind myself of this, is that people are idiots.

im generally grumpy today, so i feel quite at home in this thread. my head hurts. apparently i have sinusitis and my face hurts. my neck/shoulders/back/arms/even my hands hurt. my computer wont burn any cds and i need them by friday, especially be next friday for the lucksmiths show which i am so nervous about because i cant sing and have clearly gotten myself into something that i cant do. i can feel a pimple coming where my nose joins on to my face, you know that part? and its hurts and it feels like its going to be huge which is just what i need when im gonna be standing in front of 400 people singing badly and looking fat. i want to sew, but i dont know how. i want to clean my house but i cbf. i want to be a good mum and spend time with my kids but all i want to do is lay down and read. im reading the bell jar. again. not the best book to be reading when feeling like this, i realise that, but that brings me back to my first point which is - people are idiots, myself included

my band is playing with the lucksmiths next week. this is both exciting and terrifying.

mount gambier

humble bee had their cd launch on friday night, and it was all round pretty awesome.

there were brownies, cds, pots of tea and people - how could it not have been awesome!







thank you so much to everyone who came along, and to the humble bee twee orchestra, the super happytime funshine band for making it even more special

sewing machine of awesome

recording

i know i shouldnt peek

and if this is a sign of what kind of mother i'm going to be in the future, i should start riding dog houses and wearing big long ears cos im snoopy

but it was so cute. a notebook with his code name (his name spelt backwards), first page titled 'lost pencils', second page 'found pencils', third page 'suspicions'. all pages are empty. im glad he hasnt lost any pencils

carly cant come to the phone at the moment as she is busy revelling in the fact that she can now sleep without coughing

please leave a message and she'll get back to you as soon as she can

check it

oh yeah, we're awesome

tuesday 8th june, 1993

dear diary,
i really love adam muller at the moment. he's 163cm tall

hi noah!

noah james
21/4/2009
8 pound 11 ounces

get used to being called toby
xx

possibly the most awesome, actual age related idea x has ever had:

joining the three PS1's we have together, to make a PS3

people broke into my house and stole things

its not very nice

snuggled up with x, i run my fingers over his cheek

me: you're so soft
x: i stay out of the sun, and try my best not to get bitten or scratched by e

spew

its not nice. and its not nice when you collect almost 2 litres of it in front of your face. but i guess its better than it sitting inside you and making you feel even sicker.
one, two or three of us have been sick since last thursday. its not been the nicest of experiences. so far today, no one has vomited and i only had a brief headachey time this morning. perhaps we're on the mend? i hope so

played another gig since the last time i posted. friday night at the metro

i think we played ok. shame everyone went home tho. shame also that i spewed the rest of the night. my goodness the keepsakes are amazing. love love love them. i really hope to play with them again soon, and be better than we were.

adam comes home this week. yay :) he hasnt really been away all that long this time, so i think both of us have coped pretty well. i think when he goes next time is going to be harder. we've been looking at houses, and have found an awesome one if anyone would like to help. we need 4 or more bedrooms, close to port noarlunga, and i've come across this one. problem being that my friends currently rent it and they'd have to move out for us to live in it. dilemma. with two grown ups and a minimum of 4 kids, its gonna be tricky.

my ear still hurts. i am currently of the opinion that there is some sort of animal living in there. my other opinion is that it should get the fuck out, cos its hurting.

its been a while since my last proper post. im not sure if i've really been busy or not, or whether im maybe just living instead of surviving in my room.
i've hardly been on the computer at all, except to look at houses (anyone wanting to give away $400000, please see me) and occasionally check my email.

instead, what i've been doing is hanging out with adam, hanging out with the kids, rearranging my linen cupboard, keeping up with the dishes, eating fruit, playing gigs at the format festival in the fringe, going to band practice, riding bikes,searching for the golden aple, kicking arse on peggle, having a birthday and being completely spoilt in the presents department

humble bee have a proper website now that will be added to more and more

cheer advisory council are gonna be really busy playing heaps of shows




also, anyone who is good with family law, contacting me would be nice too. i have some questions

birthday wish list

new back
new uterus
clean house
new plug for kitchen sink
shower screen fixed
front light fixed
porch room light fixed
front door fixed
sleep in

even tho im happy now, i can still relate



postsecret

melbourne



miffy and i went to melbourne a couple of weeks ago to see the swell season. it was hot and awesome

this is us on the shuttle bus from the airport to the hostel



i told you it was us, just in case you didnt recognise us. i know how much we look like celebrities incognito with our big hats and sunglasses

the first thing we did after dropping off our bags was go to the beach



as neither of us packed swimming costumes, this was as far as we got

we wandered around st kilda, where we were staying, and found the palais theatre, where the swell season would be playing the following night



and also luna park, which lives next door



people were lining up out the front cos it still wasnt open yet. they all stood with their fingers through the wire gates, gazing in.

we caught up with ben and maddy in a cafe called borsch, vodka and tears









the restaurant was lovely, and miffy and i ate yummy rice and camembert balls and dip which were divine. we also caught up with hannah, drank lots of coffee, and found a babushka shop





on the thursday, miffy and i went to the aquarium, which was expensive and not very big, but, it had penguins!

cute turtle



do you hear that princess? its the shrieking eels! i almost had to punch a little girl to get in there

cow fish

jelly fish

miffy, gazing at her lover, the sting ray












by far the most amazing part of our trip was the wednesday night, at the palais theatre

the seats

the ceiling

us waiting patiently and excitedly

the swell season

me meeting glen hansard, who loves my hair

me and miffy and glen

my favourite photo of miffy, possibly ever

me and miffy running down the street after meeting glen, giggling like the little girls we are



it was hot and we were sleepy and i think, quite ready to go home after three days on the east coast, but it was a lovely holiday, and we should do it again sometime. glen, you're invited too