in a style that is very strange for me, i was awake last night at 3am. ho ho ho, carly, you are a funny one. actually though, instead of being awake and angry at being awake and trying to sleep, i was writing.
ive been trying to write this song for a bit over a week now. its been in bits and pieces on paper and phones all around my bed. last night it all came together

every trick in the book

Hold on tight, you're needed now.
Dont let go of me.
The cold hard light of day didnt chase those thoughts away.
In fact it set them free.
Now im trying hard to feel how im expected to feel.
Waking up to the disappointment of what is real.

I kept the message that you sent me.
Remembering, imagining, hoping yes and no.
Remember how i said that i dared you?
Tell me, i'll stop if you say so.

I dont know what it was that i was looking for, but it was comfort that i
found.
And now those constant thoughts have hit my head with such a
force, they're spinning me around.

And though i couldnt have you, i wanted you to want me.
Watch me from your side of the room.
And thats the way we played our little parts in this game,
as responsible adults its what we do.

Is it the start of a pattern, or just a strange coincidence
when our fingers reach out at the same time?

im going to attempt a little more tidying today. see how it goes