boys = stupid

e: i bet there are swear words i havent heard
x: e, there are swear words even *i* dont know

had my children been with me this morning, i believe they would have heard all the swear words they'd ever need to hear in their lives.

just after 9 is when i woke up. i dont know how long it had been going before that, but the screaming was terrifying. at first i couldnt understand a word apart from fuck. it was just noise and fuck and 'what am i supposed to do?'. my first thought was that some kid wouldnt get out of the car and go to school, so its mum was yelling at it. oh yeah, thats the neighbourhood i live in. and considering the school, i think that assumption before i'd even opened my eyes was pretty well fair enough.

but it got worse. and worse. and worse.

when i let myself look out the window, she was huddled on her front porch crying, holding a baby. he was stalking up and down the driveway swinging a baseball bat.

oh. its more than a kid not wanting to go to school.

suddenly i cant remember the other phone number for the police. then i start to wonder, maybe this *is* an emergency. he has a baseball bat, ffs, maybe 000 is called for? but i dont have to think about that anymore, because a police car pulls up. the girl runs across the lawn to the police, he follows after her, holding the bat. another car pulls up, and another. 'drop the baseball bat! drop the fucking bat!' more screaming and crying. the girl is sitting in the gutter, holding the baby, while a police woman talks to her. a paddy wagon pulls up. more screaming. from her 'just do what they say. i dont want you to get hurt'

one car drives off, two officers inside. i cant see the wagon, the other police, or the man.

the policewoman, the girl and the baby go inside, followed by another officer. two officers stroll back to their car, chatting away like its a normal morning. maybe it is

why do people come to me for relationship advice?

its not like im all that great at them

thankyou big brother

for almost an entire hour, i have been attempting to calm down the kids. big brother finishing this year is apparently the worst thing that has happened to them in their entire lives.

crying crying crying crying

e has written a letter to big brother and travis

i loved my first car. a mist green, morris 1300 nomad. awesome. we sold it years ago, and then i saw it at the local car yard a while ago. a really wanted to buy it. but i didnt.

x and i quite often talk about it, but he has different memories. he swears black and blue that i had a v dub, not a morris.

so today when we were driving to miffys and i saw my old car, i was stoked.

me: look xans! thats my old car! like, *my* old car
x: (no response, not even looking)
me: not just a car that looks the same as mine, but my exact car. the one i owned. see? its not a bug, look.
x: yeah, well
me: yeah well nothing, thats my car. exact car. exact exact car, as in the one i owned and drove around.
x: yeah well! theres a guy in the goodies who looks exactly exactly exactly like dad, but its not him, is it!

i've collected a lot of post secret postcards over the years



sometimes they just seem to fit

so her name is sunday rose, who cares. i think its pretty. it could be fork or puppy or balloon, but its not. its sunday, and i think it's lovely.

in the comments on the ninemsn site about the "bizarre choice of name", somebody said (paraphrasing) 'sunday is fine, and rose is fine, but together they sound like sunday roast'. which by itself is a dumb comment, but when you think back to 80s commercials about roast lamb 'guess who's coming to dinner' 'scram', its funny, cos wasnt tom cruise coming over?

*edit* i got my ads mixed up. this is the one i was thinking of. naomi watts. heh

future artiste

one is the original book, the other is the copy e is making. can you tell the difference?



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Now playing: SoKo - I'll Kill Her
via FoxyTunes

YES!

conversation

e: did someone teach you how to be a mum?
me: no. well, i guess i learned stuff from people, but you just sorta do it and work it out
e: oh
me: why? do you think i do a good job?
e: yeah. cos, you smile, and you have a good nose, and you know the stuff that we like. fruit, for example

sweetest thing i have heard in just about forever

BOYS, TAKE NOTE!

"im so at a loss that im looking up courting on wikipedia"